inner death

How do I cry when tears burn my face like acid? How do I smile while my heart is filled with sorrow,pain,anger? How do I stand and face the world while you keep pushing me down? Pushing hard? How do I speak when you shock me every time I open my mouth?
Should I just shut it to avoid trouble? Should I just force the smile even though it hurts? Should I just stop and let you take over? Should I? I hide the tears on my face with heavy make-up and bright lipstick…wondering when will I see that bright light at the end of the tunnel….that bright light that everybody sees but not me…hoping you’ll wake up and see the pain and anger I carry inside day-in and day-out. Tell me,do you have a heart? That heart that bleeds at the sight of pain….I mean that heart that’s pure,humble and human…that heart that’s warm and tender?
Tell me do you?