Of all the things that God could send

Of all the things that God could send.
What would be your perfect request?
What would make all life’s troubles worth it in the end?

I know what I’d ask for,
I’d ask for stability and contentment,
for prosperity and perfection!

I’d sit on my knees look up to the sky
and weep with regret for my mistakes 
and I’d ask God for forgiveness and protection!

It’s funny how God and I we can sit and talk.
This would seem like a one way conversation, 
but this friends, is the power of meditation.

I close my eyes and enter a serene state. 
When I am angry, I request that he removes all this hate.

When sadness is upon me
I beg for him to allow gladness to adorn me.

I’m a little disloyal though.
In a state of happiness 
or in a moment of success.
I sometimes forget to tell God
Because I often forget to talk to him when I am at my best.

But on the rare occasion that I do remember to be thankful.
He awards me with so much warmth and and extends my happiness to the epitome of joyful!

So of all the things that God could send
There’d be none better than a friend
a friend who could make me smile
and feel comforted too.
I sit on my knees and fold my hands, 
I look up to God and say.
“In other words, a friend like you!”

Still Searchin’

A cynic in my youth
Profusely searching for the truth
Wouldn’t believe without any proof
I concluded that everything was untrue
Soon addicted to feeling blue
Ooh the crazy things that I would do
Made me look like an ignorant fool
Oh but the world did not have a clue
That like them, I too
Was subjected to a reality so cruel
So harsh it broke me in two

Things went from bad to worse
Money disappeared from my purse
“It’s because you don’t tithe “, said the church
There they go again, looking down on me like I’m dirt
Thinking the only way to ‘save’ is to hurt
And to pierce the heart with judgmental words
Alienating the Spirit with their curbs
‘Causing separation through ideas they birthed
From their mind into a perplexed earth
While they shun all attempts to search
For the truth. The truth was sent to its grave, it traveled by hearse

Confusion reigned in the mind of this lost
Girl. Every night I’d turn and toss
Couldn’t comprehend: Blood shed for a cost?
Wandering around, where do I go Boss?
Kingdom Hall, Cathedral or Mosque?
Searching, searching not for the truth, but a box
Somewhere to hide while I detox
Remove all the toxins – a much welcomed loss
Of appetite for poisonous talks
I want to take off my shoes, take long walks
After my period of hibernation to get rid of this albatross.

The road to recovery will not be instant
It take wisdom, patience and persistence
To appreciate the journey, spread the word, make a difference.

I’m still searchin’
Learning
Living and loving