My Creed

Here I sit vigorously trying to escape from behind these crimson bars of doubt and shame

With yet another thought and looking for someone else to blame

Tears fall from my weeping eyes dropping to the dirty musky floor like acid rain

Hello? Can you hear me why don’t you answer and how can you not see my pain

The echoes of my call flow out me like sharpened daggers opening up the wounds I closed off and left untreated

The vibration of my trembles moves in synch with my beating heart dropping me to my knees suddenly im  feeling defeated

The silence suddenly has become louder, the echoes of its present throbbing in my head

Who is that? That familiar gentle voice inside of me? All this Confusion of what is being said

My hands grasping tightly to the bars that have imprisoned me, the essence of all I am trapped and deeply hidden alone in the darkness of the night

Through bleeding eyes of wounded tears I try see through the blur and distortions but nothing, not even the sign of hope or possible freedom is in sight

Nobody is hearing my cry nobody seems to care but wait hold on doesn’t seem like anyone is there, is this a delusion just my own creation of a prison created by unfounded fear

I know I removed the shackles from the chains that bound me they weighed  me and measured me I know they gone because I see them near

But yet the staggering pain has dug itself deep into the very wounds that have reappeared and opening up deeper and more prevalent forcing me to accept whats real

To break free means to pull apart the parts of me I tried to hide, the parts that became versions of stories that changed to fit in to something good to feel

To see the light I have to become the light, Embrace the pain and break the chains that I and I alone created as a shield of my own protection

To break free is to accept, to forgive and let go of all that was and all I believed it to be and to do so in a humble confession

Thought is our own worst enemy, it creates the actions that become the parts of us we no longer recognise, it reshapes us into beings of denial and shame

We walk around with wounds we think are deeply hidden yet when we come out we see just how much we had them exposed we gave them a name

That name became doubt, lack of self worth, courage and even stripped us of the freedom we meant to feel to fully complete our journey of self discovery in order to be fully freed

I am enough, the wounds do not shape me, the choices do not define me, I will rise to the beacon of my brightest light, I will be free I will succeed yes this is MY CREED