I’ve felt love, never left it to trust myself,

hence the session I cussed and lust just set my wealth.

It’s a pretty penny, paper, faker than the Us they sell.

Hand in hand I planned it to crack our shells,

but I’ll be dammed if I’ll stake “my” to “self”

my design and the way we felt,

its my demise rife in the way she helped

and I hate the “I” in the pride we held.

Decide the safest way to break the ice we melt,

played the joker, folks holdem in the times we dealt.

Shout for the blizzard, I’m bringing winter in troves

losing my mind alone throwing hope at these ghosts.

Boasts, she couldn’t find her soul roped in these poems,

tucked gently, hence the reason I chose,

the season I’m promised through the beauty she holds.

The duty I conceded to boast in the movement that duly unfolds,

a pearl of wisdom spinning the world that she knows,

and surely I’ll wake with my heart frozen and cold?

dreams cracked by the mistakes and the stones that I’ve hurled

times change, but I’m changing the “I” in me first

lie to me breathing the fire that pries at my worst

and tries every second to recollect the sighs that I’ve cursed

by my only wish and I’m dying to change

by reinvention, not intent to die in this place

but who am I? I rely on the habits you break

and the sadness in my soul resigned to the depths of this lake

revived to allow the whole world to witness my life as it breaks

yet when she smiles its like my thirst quenched by her name

through my driest summers I promise her words are the rain

and the darkest winter nights, skies brighten with the sight of her face

the sweetest dew in tulip fields colours couldn’t match her shades

all my love in a heart shaped locket hanging from the threads of my faith

and I dread the hour headed this way,

with every breath I’m blessed with I’ll live for the day

to hold you and tell you I care

to show the truth that I’m blessed to just know you were there

to whisper sweet nothings that encompass my prayers

when my casket gets lowered and I’m alone in my thoughts

I want the depths of your eyes to be the last image I caught.

How quickly they forget me, yesterday’s news, when they heard of how terribly I was raped,
Beaten and left for dead, in an alley, while walking home.
How quickly they came to offer my parents their symphathies and me their pitiful looks.
The policemen, the doctors, the religious man and even the Mayor.
All offering advice and help.
How eagerly they spoke to the news lady in her dress suite and high heels,
promising to help find the monster who did this to me.
But, just as quickly they forgot.
Too consumed with their own lives.
Nowhere in sight when I needed a lift to the hospital for more tests and pep talks from doctors and social workers.
Nowhere in sight when the doctor said “ YOU’RE PREGNANT! Do you want to keep It or get rid of it?” Damned if I do and damned if I don’t.
So quick to judge my family struggling to cope, falling apart at the seams.
No therapy for their pain or my empty soul.
How quickly they forget me, as they see my growing belly and swollen feet,
trying to do the right thing for the one who too didn’t ask for this to happen.
For now, I’m like the ones who came before me,
those that will come after me
And those just like me.
A Statistic.

He walks free,
His trial date one behind thousands awaiting to be heard.
Two weeks in jail.
Not enough evidence, before he goes missing, presumably gone for good
while I am in prison.
I am the one locked behind closed doors,
burglar bars,
barbed wire
and an electric fence.
Who sleeps with the light on, carries pepper spray and a whistle.
Afraid to be left alone, yet more afraid to be alone with me.
Who changed her hair colour,
the clothes she wears,
got new friends and even a new church.
Who cries at night when everyone is asleep
and prays for the courage to stop living to make the pain stop,
While he walks free.

The water spilt…
The sun took cover in the mountains depths
Darkness made his way to inner land and into our home.
The joy that came with the morning rise,
Was sucked in dry by the sponge that rested in our joyful stream,
The smiles were wiped away;
The only light we had was the comfort from the moon
And the candle light from those we grieved with.

If life’s intention was only a story book this thick,
That only allowed us to go this far,
So the pages in our story ended in the tragedy of yesterday;
I wish to own a magic stick,
So I can re-live the former pages that contain your existence.
If life’s intention is that I carry on further than today,
I wish to own a magic wand,
So we can re-write a different tale from this.

Time will heal…
We’ve reached a chapter where such words are meaningless,
Where all we hoped and believed in has come to test,
And only higher powers make sense.
Though no one understands the heart behind the smile,
And the number of tears we shed;
With my eyes closed I still see your form and long to hold you dearly,
But all I could hold is a bouquet of beautiful memories.

The sun made its way back to inner land and into our homes,
And with it joy and a privilege for knowing someone like…. (You)
Wish God could have spared you just for a few more years;
But you honoured a request from the Father’s call.
The peace within helped us look beyond earth’s shadows,
Gratitude for the stories we wrote yesterday,
Made its way in our hearts;
You were another beautiful flower picked from His beautiful garden.

Allow me to try and fail but not fail to try
Aim high but not yet reach the skyline
Even thou things may not go right, bright days turn into dark night
Il keep growing strong till I find my armoured knight.

I wont give up
As tears stream down like on my window pane
I wont let my thoughts go astray
I will take another chance, another leap of faith
Until this dream of mine is uncaged

Even when life throws its twists and turns
Through pitfalls and sea saws, there are things on learns
Il persist on even as the pace seem slow
As I know success will come within another blow

Success is failure turned inside out
It will come after I conquer my doubts
Break free and take on a new lease on life
For failure is just success wrapped up tight

So allow me to try and fail but not fail to try
Because soon I will reach the skyline
As things go right and each day is a bit bright
I will stand tall and be that armoured knight.

broke as shit…my financial status about to make me flip..down a jaga,,go on a wild trip…..hit the rollette …4 out of 4 neva to regret .on my way home as the thickness of my wallet has grown…think ill make it now,luck on my side,rainman the one whom made me more wise,thank you for the riches,thank you for keeping it within the triple digits ……..let it rain….let it fall as money keeps us walking tall….we are free,,,we can now see…face it without fear..face it with no regret wich always ends with a tear…