The Reason I Closed My Hearts Door

You were the first girl in my life;

You were my very first time;

If you knew I wasn’t going to be your only man;

Why did you ever ask me out, I’ll never understand;

 

I loved you unconditional;

I trusted you without doubt;

I loved you till it hurt;

But my bridges you up and burnt;

 

Against all odds I gave up my studies for you;

Gave up my dream, cause you became my dream come true;

But you cheated and left me out of the blue;

I had to pick myself up and my broken heart too;

 

Alone, when I really needed you;

You never cared only played games with my head;

10 years I tried to get you back after you up and left;

Years wasted I can never get back;

 

Today I wonder what was wrong with you;

See how your choices in life made you loose;

Pain you caused me, pain I didn’t deserve, pain I didn’t choose;

I did nothing wrong, I loved you right all along;

 

Questions I ask God;

Why did I ever choose your love;

If He knew you would hurt me someday;

Turn my life upside down when you walked away;

 

Things you did still hurt me today;

I’ve never loved the same;

Never trusted anyone;

Never gave my all ever again;

 

I see you around and notice how guys ran you through;

Now you’re a single mother used;

You could have had this good life I live now everyday my boo;

You never thought I’d stand again after I gave it all up for you;

 

When my own family left me disowned;

But I made it, maybe you should have thout it through;

When I moved up and finally let go of you;

You wanted me back, but I refused;

 

Could never allow you to break me again;

Like you did way back when;

Maybe it was not your fault;

Maybe I was saved from even more pain by God;

 

Things you did in secrect, things I never knew, I’m sure He saw;

Looking at you today, I’m glad He allowed you to break my heart;

Who I loved and who you really are are two worlds apart;

I was blinded by love because I gave my all;

 

I made it without education;

I made it with hard work and pure dedication;

So thank you for leaving me when I had no one else;

I picked up my life all by myself;

 

Cause of the pain you brought I’m doing well;

I made it to Heaven even when you put me through hell;

I contemplated suicide before I was even saved;

Before I knew God, He came and stopped me that day;

 

I never wished you the same pain;

Life has laws, you live by the choices you make;

I begged Him to send you back someday;

I’m so happy He ignored me when I prayed;

 

Even though I pleaded with tears streaming down my face;

He saw my tomorrow, while I only saw my yesterday;

By the looks of things, seems like you paid for your mistakes;

Maybe you got more than your fair share of Karma’s payback;

 

I never wanted it to end up this way;

I wanted to love you forever and marry you one day;

Got your date of birth tattoed on my right arm;

So you will always be a part of me even when I’m gone…