Archives for March 2013

The Red Pill

If my fingers could –
Reach
Down
Past the thickness that is your guard
Beneath your very earth
Where you hold the fertilized scars
Between the thorns surrounding your bosom
Concealing the warm spot
Where these arms may find rest
As the blood trickles down my palms

If this organ would –
Learn to continue beating
With the knife still firmly in its place
I know it may not look the same
But please believe the love that’s
Tried to course through these egotistical veins
For these arteries have become the –
– mezzanine –
Between all that I’ve lost
And the heart
That I’m trying to put back together again

Your very own should
See my detachment –
as the equivalence
To the things you do too
To cope with the heartbreak
For we have always been the same
Two hypocrites connected
By the subtle absence in my ribcage

With

You – simply distracted
By the forked tongues of men
In the same careless phase

I – simply attached
To every lust-coloured apple an
Eve seemed to bring my way

We – simply an act
Of our perception that these emotions
Are all that have remained

All I wanted was a name
Back when all I had,
Was the shallow attraction that
Kept my gaze at your face
Your eyes instead thought me to be the
Reincarnated demons of men who only
Craved the secrets below your waist
When the truth is that greater ecstasy
Comes from looking upon a naked soul
While undressing the
Intellect of
her
brain.

But then comes those games
Dictated socially;
You and I jump awkwardly between
Prejudiced views of how Love should be
Evidently, I could sit in a group
And preach the paraphrased truth
Only to live the sinner’s story

Hoping to see a compromise
Built from the self-imposed guilt
And the glory –
Curing your conscience
With the right words on a Sunday morning;
A game of halos hanging from horns we grew
The moment distortion
Became this society’s calling

And as we dance the same dance
Of broken lovers trying to find
The missed step
Recollecting the memories;
That feeling of anxiety when that which
Left – you in sorrow comes back with regret
“I am nothing like the last tenant”;

Conversations where
Our hearts try to connect,
Kick off the dust and
Let a new soul into our mess-
Messages of communicating a desire
For the universe to grant you the best
In this stranger you’ve now put to
The oh-so-familiar test

Because you and I live in a world where
My fractured trust
Cannot accept your sincere attempts
And your regrets
Keep me out of the bruised parts of you
Lost in another man’s conquest

So what is left?

Fragile boy with a heart that
Thought it once knew gold
Meets insecure girl who
Now thinks the world to be cold
So Stereotype meets Assumption
At a party and their drunken selves
Are as honest as they’ll ever come to know

You and I
We are tied by the same tragedy
Of meeting Love and seeing the wolf
Behind the sheep-skinned fallacy
“The Matrix is just a fantasy”,
She said, swallowed the red pill
And walked back to her reality

Woman

Woman….you will hold the blade at its sharpest
You will smile through the flood of tears from your gracious eyes
You will hope for a better tomorrow through the hurricane
You will give up your dreams for the pnes you adore and love
You will love like you have never been hurt

You will be naive of the truth of abuse
You will keep hoping that he might change
That he will remember the first day he fell in love with you
When he told you that you are the most beautiful woman alive
When he told you that he cherishes and worships you

You will put on extra make up to cover those bruises he punched
and scrached on your devine face
You will keep making excuses for him
and he will continue to dominate you
He will kick you out naked at the middle of night
with nowhere to go and you will beg for his mercy

The scars and wounds will heal and vanish
You’ll restore your beauty again but you will be bitter
You will want to kill him for killing you internally
You will want to stab him for slicing your heart into pieces
You will want to break him for your broken bones and promises

You will want to run away from the stranger you see in the mirror
for the eyes staring back at you full of hatred and so cold
You will keep searching for yourself without avail
You will wounder what happened to you and who is this empty being

He will continue with his life
And you will have to refind yourself
He will pick up where he left
And you will pick up all the pieces of you
You will still tremble at night but you will get through it

You will stand as the rock that you are
You will smile once more
You will be stronger and less angrier
You will slowly be you
You will walk again wiyh confidence
You will recognise the face you see in the mirror
You will be better than the bitterness

Maybe you will love again
Maybe you will forgive
But you will never forget

Woman.