Archives for January 2, 2014


You said the words “I Love You”, when you knew it wasn’t true;

You said you would come see me sometime girl, but you never do;

I tried to play it off, as if I misunderstood;

See, my past has taught me never to assume;

But actions never lie, I made you my queen girl, but you made me your fool;


Looking back girl I wish I knew;

That you’d be playing with my heart while I was loving you;

I can’t see into the future, so these scars are lessons learnt along the way;

I could say life is unfair, but these are just the choices I’ve made;


Life is not like those fairy tale stories, you can’t undo past mistakes;

All you can do is learn along the way;

I could say I wish we never met or that I never approached you that day;

But I’ll still remain in the same place, nothing would change;


So instead I thank God I did, even If it sounds strange;

Hear me out, give me a moment to explain;

Because of girls like you, I’m wiser than I was yesterday,

No girl would ever get another chance to run that same game;


Will that erase the pain you caused, never days;

But I’ll be wiser when another bitch slides my way;

I’ll see them same signs and when she greets I’ll just lift my middle finger, turn around and walk away;

Sounds cold, but as God as my witness I refuse to be hurt again.


My Bad

My bad girl I admit you got the best of me;

Your shady ways had my mind decieved;

But I ain’t really concerned;

I learnt through the bridges you burnt;


Your ways will backfire on your shady ass one day;

Karma will take revenge for the tears you burned upon my face;

You’ll look back and regret it someday;

Lies you fed me and I gave you the benifit of the doubt;


Believed them throughout;

I’m to blame I have the tendancy to fall for them bad girls;

Guess I am the reason I’m hurt;

It’s always been the case;


You weren’t the first bitch that did me this way;

And you probably won’t be the last;

Because of girls like you I’m wiser cause of my past;

So girl, I ain’t mad;


Life’s a gamble, you gots to loose sometimes to become a better man;

My wife I’m sure will thank you one day for breaking my heart;

I’ve learnt what it feels like to be torn apart;

I’ll never do the same to another girl again;


You never understand another’s struggled until you’ve endured the same pain;

So in hindsight I’m glad you did me that way;

Your pain inspired me to write these words and they propelled me into fame;

I just pray you never come my way again;


I can’t promise I won’t also run game;

And pretend to love you when I don’t feel the same;

That’s how you once did me;

I’m saved, yes, but I still have the nature of a human bieng;


I know I shouldn’t take revenge because of my yesterday;

But fuck that, one day God will judge me and then I’ll pay;

Now I admit I ain’t filled with hate;

Just regret for the fool of me you made;


I’m real and I will take my revenge if Karma allows me that fortune one day;

You’re an A Grade ho, that’s all I am going to say;

I feel sorry for the next fool who comes your way;

I’d warn him but you’re too fast, it’ll be too late;


He’d think I’m just after you again;

But in the pain you left me, I found the way to stage of fame;

I endured all this undeserved pain;

One day you’ll recall our yesterdays;


And wonder why you hurt the answer God sent to you all those lonely nights with tears you prayed;

But know this girl, I’ll never come back your way again;

Pain made me wise, my heart will never allow you to run the same game;

Before you ever call me, know if you do it’s too late and to you  I will do the same….


On My Mind

Girl I gots you on my mind;

Dreamt of you again last night;

Us bieng a part, yes it’s been for quite a while;

But this morning I woke up with that naughty smile of mine;


The one that was wiped away when you left my side;

For all you did to me girl, know this truth;

I’m not mad at you;

True love, I’ve learnt keeps no record of wrong;


I’ve felt this way ever since you’ve been gone;

My feelings never changed, they are just as strong;

Time could never erase what we had;

Love is not an emotion but a choice to endure through times of good and bad;


It’s not that I’m still stuck on us;

I’m just an honest man, like I always was;

I’ve made mistakes that cannot be undone;It’s the consequences of bieng unexperienced in love and bieng young;


If I had the power to go back in time, without a second thought girl I would;

Just to have another chance to love you;

But no matter how I pray, it’s just something I don’t have the power to do;

My heart still cries a river that leads to you;


Life has changed and you’re no longer here;

And loosing you was always my biggest fear;

You are and will always be that one that got away;

God knows If I could;


I’d erase the me that you once knew;

So we could meet again and we could start brand new;

But these are only wishes of mine that will never come true;

And my biggest wish is just to love that girl I once knew, that girl is you

Kirsten, If Only You Knew

Alone in my room listening to Mario Vasquez – “Gallery”;

Girl, everytime I hear that song it takes me back in memory;

2007, when you made the choice to love me;

When my heart was stuck on someone else and I pretended to feel the same as you;


Now I see how foolish I was as I count back the years;

Oh how I wish I had this wisdom back then so I could reverse all your tears;

But I was too young and failed to see;

You were all I ever needed, my disguised blessing;


I pray God gives you my mind for just a little while;

So you can see that these words are from my heart and not just another lie;

That I really do love you and your heart sees the truth before my demise;

Damn, my heart fell when you found someone new and then got married;


I wish I could go back and show you, i’m so sorry;

All I need God to do, is take me back to the day I first met you;

With the things I know today;

Cause If He did I’d appreciate you and never let your love slip away;


Aish and looking back, girl nobody ever loved me as much as you;

But I played the game but I forgot the rules;

I paid the price and the ultimate price was loosing you;

Time has moved on but I’ve never loved the same;


I keep wishing I could reverse the days;

As every moment I hurt you like a broken record replays;

But you showed me what true love was;

And now I know what too look out for;


Even if I’m still looking out for you;

When my heart, soul and mind knows, never again will I ever get the chance to love another you;

Yet every year I ask God to give me the same birthday present;

“I want another chance with her Lord, Why was I so blind” Amen as I send my prayer request;


And even if I hate on you and act cold, girl know I’m full of pride and I just pretend;

I only relaised I loved you the day you told me our love has come to an end;

I fight with you today, cause I love you too much and can’t just be just another friend;

Truth is, If God said I could have anything in this world, my only wish would be to have one more chance to love that angel He named “Kirsten”

Last Christmas

Last year Christmas, how could I forget, girl you were still mine;

A year has gone by and you’re still heavy on my mind;

Cloudy days since have stolen my sunshine;

Ever since I haven’t been able to wear a smile;


Do I ever invade your dreams sometimes;

I wake up often with tears in my eyes;

Wishing my dreams were real,cause babygirl I want to love you just one more time;

So I lay my heart under your Christmas tree;


Hoping that the next gift you open is me;

You haven’t called me since that cold January day;

The realization sets in that you’ve never felt the same;

Asking myself if you never loved me then why did you pretend?;

Why lead me on when you knew love had already come to an end;

I miss taking you out and spoiling you, just to see that beautiful smile;

I won’t lie I miss your kiss from time to time;

And I know I should be over you by now;


But life isn’t fair or so I’ve found out;

My heart misses you and this silence in my room at night is so loud;

I miss the one that got away;

And girl that one just happens to bear your name


“Evander”, My Hood, I Never Forgot About You

Even though I’ve relocated I’m still A “G”;

I’m all for my Evander thugs even though now my numberplate is laced with “GP”;

I love my hood, from every block to every street;

You are part of my family, Nigga’s I was raised in “MP”;


I stay real and remain true, always staying down for all my niggas stuck in the hood;

For those who know me, you know I only spit the truth;

Money and fame never changed me, I had money even before the world ever noticed me;

So this one is for “Evander”, my love, my hood;


If you thought, you thought wrong, I could never forget about you;

“Legends”, “Bafana” Taverns shout out to you, you are like family;

“Dan’s” and “Monica’s” thank you for fighting the law and being shebeen’s;

All of you are like my bloodline, forever a part of me;


I had a cold family home, so I turned to the streets, you’ll are the reason my childhood years are filled with the best memories;

To “Veli” & “Johnson”, even though we had beef, when shit went south me alone in the streets, you’ll stood up for me;

So I lift my glass out of love and respect, even if you’ll reloacted to the cemetry;


So from “Tinki-Tonki” pre-primary;

That’s where I started so my first love is for you;

From “TP Stratten” to “Evander Highschool”;

The most respect and love goes out to you;


“Evander High”, you are the reason I’m made;

Because of you, my name is associated with fame;

Many hated, most assumed I’d fail because of the thug nigga I was back then;

So to those haters who doubted, success is the best form of revenge;


Yeah I was labelled, crazy and different;

But one day you’ll look back and thank God for my ass, I’m your voice, I’ll make the world listen;

To the students coming up that I never got to meet face to face;

Take it from me, study hard, without education the world is cold and hard everyday;


Be cool at school but don’t forget your mind;

When you’re alone at home study all the time;

To all the teachers I gave so much grief;

I had a young and reckless mind, never knew about life, thought you were hating;


But now I realise you only wanted the best for me;

I finally found my purpose, so know your teachings were never in vain, they helped me succeed;

For all my ways and those stressful days, I’m sorry;

If you think I ran away or forgot about you,let me explain so you know the deal;


Dear enemies of mine, who’s first, oh yes that bitch nigga named “Mondli”;

I never forgot about your ass, I was just waiting for the perfect opportunity;

Remember that day at the pool shop in “Evander”, with my 9mm, I could have smoked you;

You can thank God I was stopped by my late nigga “Dru”;


They say never start a war until you got your money behind you;

I got’s mine bitch nigga, I hope you do too;

Most motherfuckers there fear you;

But I’m just wise, I laid low, I never give up, ask anyone from my hood;


I was a Thug nigga running the streets even before you were born;

“Mondli”, I’m coming for your ass nigga, watch your back, bitch nigga you’ve been warned;

So fuck you and fuck peace, best you get your crew ready, like a nigga’s last breath I’ma make you fade away;

To all the nigga’s I’ve lost along the way;


Who taught me the rules of the game;

I sip Hennessy and pour a 5th out to send my respect to Heaven’s gates;

You niggas are the reason I’m finally made;

To my Lil’ Homies, “Vanzo” & “Shado” just to name a few;


If ever you’re in danger or in need, never hesistate to call cause I was and will always be down for you;

Our future is in the youth, my young nigga’s that’s why I’ll ride and die for all of you;

My advice is always keep in mind, life’s a game, learn the rules;

In your mind you win every fight so there’s no need to grab a gat and shoot;


Trust me, nigga’s I’ve been to the pen and jail ain’t for you;

Never show fear no matter what shit you go through;

People know my name on those hood streets;

I didn’t just leave a memory, ask them about “Kribo”, niggas I left a legacy;


Always keep in mind niggas are gonna hate you no matter what you do;

So fuck people, you are only young once, always keep it real and remain true;

The only person you need to impress is God, fuck all them other people around you;

“Evander”, my hood, ride till I die, I moved up but I could never forget about you;


I may change, fame might chase my name, but I’ll always remain the same;

You were my first love and until I die that will always be the case;

So to all my “Evander” niggas, this one is for all of you;

Before fame, you were my first love, and I’ll never forget about my original hood.

Thought I’d Let You Know

You are the reason I smile;

You are never too far to hear me cry;

You are my protector so battles I never need to fight;

When darkness creeps in, You are my shining light;


You catch my every tear as I cry at night;

You consider them more precious than diamonds that shine twice as bright;

I still fail to understand why I mean so much to Thee;

When all I seem to do is hurt You selfishly;


Why would a King leave His throne just to come and rescue someone like me;

I always thought I chose You, when in truth You had me on Your mind that day You died at Calvery;

How everyday You still surprise me with the smallest of things;

You show me love when I don’t deserve a thing;


When I have no where to turn, when I am about to loose all hope, there You are;

A crack need only begin to damage my heart and You hear from a far;

Where would I be without You;

That’s why I’m so thankful I’m part of Your chosen few;


It blows my mind to think somone cared about a nothing like me;

Someone who gave up their life so eagerly;

Someone who didn’t need too but chose too;

No words could express the depth of love I feel for You;


But this You already know;

For this my heart is forever bound to You like two ex-lovers who just can’t seem to let go;

I love You Jesus , I just thought I’d let You know

When the mirror doesnt smile back

She looked at the scale and willed the scale’s numbers to go down.
Her heart pumping hard in her ribbed chest,
Her hands clammy,
Her screaming belly hollow and empty,
Begging for solid nourishment.
Having run for hours the previous day,
Her heart went faint and her legs almost buckled as
Knew that she’d have to run harder today again to get those kilo’s off
And thought about the black coffee and dry toast that she’d have to eat again,
Because in the mirror still wasn’t smiling back at her,
Even though she worked so hard.